FIVE HABITS OF HIGHLY EFFECTIVE VALENTINES

Just a little over two weeks until V-Day. Do you have a plan?

For those of you – well this post is mostly for men – who are at a loss this year as to how to deal with Valentine’s Day, I have some advice for the LOVEWORN (a.k.a., people in long term relationships who need some ideas about how to reignite the spark). It is a misconception widely off the mark that on Valentine’s Day one must spend money on gifts, going out, hiring a babysitter, going to a movie together, etc. I daresay many a woman on the receiving end of such Valentine’s efforts might rather have spent a quiet evening at home in front of the fire, IF the evening were done RIGHT. Thus, my advice this Valentine’s Day is cheap, relatively easy to implement, and also fairly foolproof way to impress your valentine.

1. TREAT HER LIKE A LADY

Important assumption under this point is GIRLS ARE NOT LIKE GUYS. Wives do not want to be like a swell roommate who helps with chores and has sex with you occasionally. It’s important to recognize how your woman is different from your male friends and treat her like the woman she is. She wants to hear your feelings about her, why you love her, and get some appreciation for all the little ways she makes your life easier. Show her how special she is through special considerations like helping her on with her coat, holding her chair, opening the door for her, telling her how nice she looks, and if you are really inspired, buying her a nice gift or taking her out on a date. But just beware, doing the latter two things without some thought on former things takes away some of the bling for women. It really is the thought that counts.

2. DO STUFF FACE-TO-FACE, NOT JUST SIDE BY SIDE.

This is one of my biggest valentine’s beefs. Don’t go out on a date and spend the entire time doing stuff together. This is what guys do – do stuff together. At least once, you need to look into her eyes and tell her you love her. One of the best ways to make your lady’s hormones bubble is if you spend some time talking with her about your relationship and how you feel about her. And, you can’t really build intimacy without ever looking at a person. It may feel weird to guys, but chicks dig it.

3. A TOUCH IS WORTH A THOUSAND WORDS

Important assumption under this point: touch = non-sexual, but romantic contact. (FYI, touching doesn’t count in a woman’s romance quotient, if it is leading up to making out or having sex.) Some examples of what I mean: running your hand or finger up and down her arm as you are standing near each other, running your finger under her chin as you look at her, holding hands as you walk together somewhere, scratching her back or massaging her neck or feet.

4. REMEMBER THE THRILL OF THE HUNT.

Even in our liberated world, I think it is still commonly accepted that men enjoy the thrill of the chase and women like to be chased. Why should this dynamic end just because we found Mr. or Mrs. Right? Call her out of the blue and say you want to see her for lunch and then have a short make out session in the driveway. Corner her in some room of the house and give her a really great kiss followed by a low growl. Playfulness and a certain wild, untamed quality to your Valentine’s Day will help stoke those dying embers nicely. Which leads me to my next point…

5. IT’S ABOUT THE SEX, STUPID

Need I say more about this? Well, yes, I probably should. Most important: take your time and make it really, really good. ‘Nuff said?

Ladies, anything I missed or got wrong? Let me know. Here's to having a great V-day!